5 reasons I didn’t want to have sex WITH a condom!

I’m Nick, 22 years old and from Tassie. I’m giving you the low down on my relationship with condoms.

1.    I wasn’t confident enough

The idea of putting on a condom in front of my soon to be sexual partner would make me so nervous I’d lose my boner. Yep, I’m saying that the quick condom demonstration by my Year 10 PE teacher didn’t give me any confidence that I could put a condom on right before sex.

I learnt pretty quickly confidence is key. Here are some tips on how to get one on without a hitch.

Your other option is seeing if your partner can do it. I found this much more enjoyable, and I learnt a thing or two along the way.

2.    It didn’t feel sexy

When you’re in the heat of the moment, stopping never seems like a good option. I always thought it just ruined the mood. It wasn’t until I found out that you could dirty talk about condoms that I finally reconsidered.  And I mean, who doesn’t love a good whisper or moan in the ear when you’re getting ready to go.

I love it when you dirty talk

For me, having my partner dirty talk (even about condoms) is a big turn on!

dirty talk = communication

And there’s nothing better than knowing what my partner is up for!

3.    She was always using contraception

“I’m on the pill”, was part of the standard dialogue when chatting before getting sexy in my first relationships. Sweet! That meant she was covered, and we weren’t at risk of pregnancy. Next, a visit to the clinic to test for STIs was booked.  All clear – and we were good to go!

It wasn’t until I started having more casual sex that I realised that wasn’t enough. Condoms are the sexiest form of protection because they also protect my best bits from Sexually Transmitted Infections (STIs). Also, I realise that contraception is definitely my responsibility too. From now on I use condoms with any partner up and until we know we are only seeing each other and we both get tested for STIs. This way we are looking out for each other.

4.    I wanted it to actually feel good

I didn’t want to reduce the pleasure and sensitivity for me or my partner. And then I tried it with lube! Lube improved the sensitivity and enjoyment for us both during sex. It turns out that using lube means it’s less likely that the condom will break- bonus!

Using a condom with lube also makes anal sex a lot more enjoyable. Because the anus doesn’t produce natural lubricant, it can be uncomfortable to get started. This has meant that both of us can enjoy it a lot more.

5.    They said yes, so I didn’t want to stop

A big yes from both of us meant it was full steam ahead.

It wasn’t until I was asked if I had a condom and awkwardly had to say no, that I realised sex with a condom is better than no sex at all. Because I came unprepared, they changed their mind and were no longer keen. Fair enough. Everyone has the right to change their mind at any time. I suggested we reschedule.

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